Posted by: Marisa | July 19, 2013

Red, White, and Blueberry Picking

Once upon a time on a small blueberry patch in central Wisconsin there was a blueberrologist named Peter. He had dedicated his life to growing and studying the most rare species of blueberries known to man. Peter was sure that his species of berries would help cure a hideously uncomfortable form of diaper rash. He was focused and determined to eliminate the uncomfortable situation forever.

Meet Peter.

Meet Dan

Billy is Peter’s not-so-identical twin brother. He’s the wild child of the family and has  dedicated his life to dancin’ with the ladies. He happens to be broke right now and needs some money-cash. He  planned a trip to the blueberry patch specifically to sucker Peter into hooking him up.

Meet Billy.

66 wild child MG_1780

Peter’s a smart guy. The minute he saw Billy roll up to the blueberry patch on the Fourth of July he knew he was about to be on the losing end of a money exchange. Before Billy had a chance to ask for anything Peter took him straight to the blueberries that needed to be harvested.

L giving berry lesson

In his nasally little voice he told Billy, “Brother, these are my prized possessions. I am weeks away from having the final version of my anti-butt-rash serum ready for human trials. There are just enough berries on these bushes for me to create the serum I need so we must pick them quickly and efficiently. We cannot let any go to waste. And we certainly can’t eat any”.

24 Uh no Im not

“What do you mean we can’t eat any?!” Billy questioned. “That’s the only reason I agreed to come out to this patch in the first place!”

8 I can see you eating them

“Are you kidding me? Just don’t eat any. I need enough berries to create my serum. There is a very specific way to pick them. Watch as I show you. First you find a bushel that looks ripe…”

3 Tug them 1“and give it a little…”

2 tug them 2


1- Tug them 3“uuug.”

4 Tug them - give them a good

As Peter looked up with a handful of freshly picked blueberries he noticed that Billy hadn’t been paying attention at all. Through the bushes Peter saw that Billy was…

36 J eating Not sure what youre talking about

35 J eating

“Billy, I told you not to eat any of the berries!”

37 J eating 2“I’m not!”

54 MG_1800

“I’m just bringing these berries to the bucket.”

21 Ah yes these are perfect

“Okay, but seriously, keep your pie hole shut and the berry’s out.” Peter turned back to the bushes. Billy didn’t.

9 Im not eating any berries

Instead, he kept a close eye on his brother. “Blueberry picking is for chumps” he whispered under his breath. At the first chance he got he snuck away for a break.

33 J under the blueberry bush

Under the shade of a blueberry bush. Where he was careful…

34 bush

to get every last berry into his mouth.

6 Little piece in the center

When Peter found him he was furious.


He stormed off, shouting to Billy, “You’ve ruined my chances of curing diaper rash forever you little punk!”


And sough comfort from his main investor who told him not to worry because he had just come up with an even better way to cure diaper rash. Peter perked up as he listened to his investor comment, “If all the children in the world become potty trained there will be no diapers and if there are no diapers there can be no diaper rash.”

This made Peter very happy.

Happy Fourth of July!




  1. Kudos!! the best so far. And the dialog is spot on with those pictures!!!!, Keep them coming.

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